Chad McGee: Bounty Hunter
on Aug 30, 2013
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Sep 03, 2013 at 1:34pm
This video is private, and that makes me sad.
Sep 03, 2013 at 11:35am
Dave and Matt-
Thank you guys for taking the time to provide feedback, it is very helpful. And worry not, we'll be back!
Sep 03, 2013 at 7:27am
Yeah this had some good beats. The constant breaking of the fourth wall took me out of it.
But the acting of Chad McGee was really good. And the camera work and editing was nice.
Please make more stuff. Read up on writing pilots and keep making and learning and you'll definitely get there.
This may be obvious advice, but send your script to people and get feedback before you shoot. Maybe even read it with a few friends to see what's working/ not working before you shoot as well.
Aug 30, 2013 at 10:10pm
Bryce! Hey man, I was real stoked to see your name on a pilot.
The panel really appreciated the "Produced for Channel 101" card at the end. Haha.
There's some good jokes in here, some fun bits, but I think it was overshadowed by some jokes derailing things. I would say the meta jokes probably worked against you. The GLAD thing confused people. Someone at the panel said "Wait? So this is supposed to be a reality show?" and didn't recognize it as breaking the fourth wall, which also says something about your production value if we can't tell if it's supposed to be cinematic or found-footage / reality. And then when it kind of tapered off at the end, it was cute, but created an end-with-a-whimper instead of an end-with-a-bang situation. Although that drone helicopter shot was really sweet.
I think you could do more to make it clear what kind of show you're making. What kind of show are you making? I'm not totally sure. If this was a TV show on the air, what would it be? What kind of conventions do they use? Do they have an intro sequence? Etc. A good place to start is to try to pump the essence of a TV show you love into a silly enjoyable 5-minutes.
I know casting is tough, but I'd like to see the other dudes give as much to their performance as Chad McGee was giving. Give them some stronger direction and stronger choices to make to help those characters come alive. You want to see that guy NEED his ramen situation resolved. He can't just say those lines. You want to connect with that need, and I didn't. Maybe give your buddies some more interesting stuff to wear. You could do a lot to create an interesting character by mixing up the wardrobe. It seems like these dudes are wearing the shirts they showed up in.
Same goes for locations - the parking lot and house work for your storytelling, but they got a little stale as the scenes went on.
But yeah man! Glad to see you submitting to this. Channel 101 is a blast and I'm looking forward to seeing what you send us next.
Aug 30, 2013 at 4:45pm
I submitted to Channel 101 to learn, so lay on the feedback! Thanks.
Aug 30, 2013 at 2:39pm
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