Rejectee Therapy for This was my first pilot submission, and it wasn't screened. I'd really love some feedback so
Started by Brayden Good on Oct 28, 2017
  • I think the simple art style is one you can definitely get away with if, like Sergio said, the characters are chocked full of personality. If you speed up the story beats and use that last minute for character development, It would've made it into something that I'd want to see a 2nd episode for. I think you're on the right tract, don't give up Brayden!
    Jan 15, 2018 at 9:45pm
  • I'm gonna focus on the audio aspect of the clip. I think it was a quite decent work, but i believe that the cliché stock sounds chosen were counterproductive. The foley of the explosions and the bong smash were effective, and in general it was ok.
    The voices sound too flat, they lack'd personality and mostly were all the same in diferent tones. They need acting. My favourite one was the voice of the robot, both of it (the translated and the echoed no translated one).
    Nov 22, 2017 at 3:15am
  • Hi Brayden. I think this pilot struggled with pacing, there were a few long pauses when there didn't need to be that took the momentum out of the story, which was otherwise good. In my opinion some of the jokes didn't quite land because you didn't play them up as much as you could have or the pay off wasn't as large as it could have been. The animation style was fun and the weirdness of the story worked great with that.
    Oct 28, 2017 at 3:43pm
    Oct 28, 2017 at 2:15pm
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