Ripped By A Miracle, Rejected
on Aug 01, 2017
I just rewatched. I think structure is something you should put more focus on when making your next pilot. So you got a scene where these guys bully a nerd, then a scene where the nerd gets a wedgie that kills him, and then half the episode is the cops standing around talking about this guy that died. That's not a story. A story, in the most basic form, is a main character(s) has a goal and pursues it.
On YouTube, your episode description is: "A wedgie miraculously divides one tortured soul into two sane half “siblings” who investigate miracles to prove the providence of the God who saved them, and investigate crimes to pay the bills." That is 100% not evident in the pilot you have. The pace and thrust would work better if he got split in half and they start solving crimes immediately.
To me personally, this pilot had one cool blood effect and no laughs. Sometimes purposefully bad acting is really funny but I just didn't find that to be the case here -- especially with the main character's acting. Usually absurd premises are better served with solid acting, taking everything seriously.
And a small, overused note that is very important is please work on your sound. It's much easier to get into a pilot when you can hear what the characters are saying.
Thanks for submitting!
Aug 10, 2017 at 6:43pm
Aug 07, 2017 at 6:36am
We made a second episode too. I was wondering if it's possible to re-edit and resubmit? Maybe it would work better if I edited both episodes into one.
Aug 01, 2017 at 3:29am
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